The other day I was talking to someone who had completed the Myers-Briggs, a system of classifying personality types. She found out that she was an introvert. This brought her a tremendous amount of relief. Prior to this, she continuously forced herself to go out and socialize when she really just wanted time to herself.
She felt a sense of guilt when she wanted to stay in. When she realized she was an introvert, it released her feelings of guilt . This also gave her permission to do what she sometimes wanted to do – absolutely nothing!! What a novel idea in a world focused on productivity.
We live in an extrovert society filled with celebrities, reality television, Tweets and Facebook status updates. It is estimated that approximately 75% of our society are extroverts. As such, there is an expectation to behave like society. This can leave introverts feeling alone and less-than.
The main characteristic difference is that introverts draw their energy from within. On the other hand, extraverts draw energy from the world around them. Here are 6 signs that you are an introvert:
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When feeling stressed or tired, you prefer spending time by yourself, reading a book, watching a movie or taking a bath, rather than being around others
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You prefer a small group of close friends over a large group of friends
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You prefer intimate conversations as opposed to small talk You enjoy your quiet alone time
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You feel alone in a crowd
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You need to shut down to recharge your batteries
Introverts need to expand energy in order to get things done since their brain processes things differently. Introverts are sensitive to the brain chemical dopamine. When an introvert is overstimulated in their external environment, the overdose of dopamine exhausts them. On the other hand, extroverts crave high levels of dopamine and adrenaline is needed for the production of dopamine. Introverts avoid the additional exposure to stimulation, as they are adequately stimulated in their daily life.
Introverts need to introvert and extraverts need to extravert. If you are an introvert and try to live like an extravert, you are disconnecting from your true self. For instance, if you are an introvert but your family are all extraverts or you work in a field where you are expected to be an extravert, you develop a persona. This can cause fatigue, anxiety and depression. The same can occur with extraverts, where they develop a persona when there is an expectation from others to be an introvert. At times extreme introversion or extraversion stem from too much of the opposite; it is the psyche attempting to correct for excessive one-sidedness. Polarity is not healthy. At the same time, the process of becoming whole and your true self requires introverts to integrate their extraversion. Extraverts must assimilate their introversion.
The world can benefit greatly from the qualities that introverts have to share. In order to shine, learn what works for you. If you are an entrepreneur or in a position where you need to sell, find a system that you like. Leverage your qualities. Perhaps you want to meet people individually, shoot them an email or call them to introduce yourself. Get comfortable and meet them one on one, this may be more in line with your level of comfort rather than a networking event.
Typology is a powerful lens to view yourself and others like your partner, family, friends and coworkers. Recognizing and appreciating the complexity of introversion can allow you to accept and honor yourself and become the individual you were meant to be.
Are you an introvert? If so, I’d love to hear your experiences and tips for navigating in a world of extroverts.